Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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