Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Randomize