i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
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