If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize
