well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped