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• (586): View more from Michigan

  Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better

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• (556): View more from

  I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.

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