Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Randomize
