Need sex. Gaining weight.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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