You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize