As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girls should come with a carfax report
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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