I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
