Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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