don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
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