Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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