I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
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