I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize