This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
