apparently the secret to your success is patron
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
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