i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
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That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
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TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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