Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
