problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I looked at my own cervix.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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