I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
You're a waste of cheezeits
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
