Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
