Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
