Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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