I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
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