I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
