Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I party with great urgency now.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
