Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
