This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
