You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
I think I just sharted jello shots
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
