I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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