i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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