There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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