I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
