Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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