And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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