i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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