i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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