We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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