Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Randomize
