i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
