if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize