You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Randomize
