Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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