I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Randomize
