I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
30 People Reveal The Moment They Realized: ‘Oh Sh*t, I’m An A**hole’
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
30 Tiny Celebrity Tattoos You’ll Want To Run Out And Copy ASAP
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
