she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
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