OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
True but thats because hes a fetus.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
