just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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