Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
